It's Good to be a Man

Extending God's house & father-rule by helping men to establish their own houses in strength, workmanship & wisdom.

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Where we stand on…

What follows is a list of all today’s major controverted issues in gendered piety, and where we stand on them. The order is as alphabetical as we could make it.

What should you call us?

We reject the terms complementarian (explanation) and red pill (explanation) because there are too many problems with the doctrines typically bundled under those labels. We accept the term patriarchal, in the sense that Christianity is patriarchal; it is a religion of the patriarchs—Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob—who serve as models for all Christian men to represent the rule of their Father over those given into their care (cf. Eph 3:15). However, we reject the “patriarchalist movement” (e.g., Vision Forum) as hyper-patriarchalism. The term patriarchy is also not exhaustive in describing our position, since it is narrowly focused on rulership rather than our broader domestic, civic, and religious duties as men and women.

The best term we have for describing our view is gendered piety—i.e., the unique duties to God and man entailed by living out one’s sex.

Entries with arrows next to them can be expanded for more information.

Sexuality & societyForAgainstIt depends
Chivalry The code of conduct that regards women as deserving honor because they are purer or more naturally sanctified than men, rather than because they are weaker vessels.
Contraceptives Abortifacient contraceptives, including the pill, are intrinsically wrong, as is a pattern of deliberate unfruitfulness in marriage. However, not all contraceptive methods are intrinsically wrong, and contraception can be a blessing when used wisely. See If marriages should be fruitful, can we use contraceptives?
Divorce and remarriage We believe that God always prefers the marriage covenant to be restored rather than dissolved. However, in cases of adultery and abandonment, divorce and remarriage are permissible.
Education for women Knowledge and wisdom are biblical virtues which women are commended for having. We strongly support giving women (and men) the best possible educations, with a special focus on areas that will most help them excel in their natural duties as women (or men). We are generally opposed to modern higher education for women, and to a lesser extent men, because it achieves the opposite of this goal. However, knowledge and wisdom can be pursued in many ways, and should be pursued throughout life.
LGBTQ+ as sexual orientations or gender identities
Marital corporal punishment The view that husbands may physically discipline their wives as they do their children. Bnonn publicly considered this question in late 2018 to early 2019, but, like Michael, came to firmly reject it. See his statement on his blog.
No-fault divorce
Patriarchy We define this generally as the principle that God’s rule is to be represented exclusively through men in the civil, domestic, and ecclesiastical spheres.
Polygamy
Pornography
Soulmates/ONEitis The view that there is only one romantic partner who is right for you.
Women’s dutiesForAgainstIt depends
Civil rulers For a helpful summary of our reasoning, see 5 clear reasons Christians should oppose female heads of state on Bnonn’s blog.
Deaconesses In cases where deacons are merely recognized servants in a congregation, deaconesses may be permissible, and are found in the early church; in cases where deacons are authorities in a congregation, we are against women in this role.
Military & law-enforcement See Why a woman bearing the sword is an abomination to the Lord on Bnonn’s blog.
Pastors/elders
Preachers to any sex See 7 reasons women may not preach, period for a comprehensive overview.
Teachers of doctrine to men We are against women taking roles that place them over men, and which invert the natural relationships or duties that God established; e.g., a woman leading a mixed Bible study, or a wife assuming responsibility for teaching her husband. However, there is nothing intrinsically disordered about a man receiving new religious knowledge from a woman; e.g., this happens regularly in any well-functioning religious family, or during informal evangelism.
Teachers of doctrine to women and children We are for this in the natural social relations between older and younger women, or mothers and children, which Scripture presupposes. However, a woman teaching in a formal church setting is typically an overreach into the role of the pastors, and most modern women who teach are far younger than Scripture requires.
Workers in another man’s household The biblical pattern indicates that this is not ideal, and in the modern day is often pursued sinfully to the detriment of a woman building her own house and supporting her husband. For unmarried women with no other good options, however, it is certainly permissible; it is also often necessary for married women to support their own houses for various reasons (especially the loss of general household productivity in the world). See But who does the dishes?
Workers in their own man’s household Working in the household does not imply working exclusively in the home. A woman should be oriented first and foremost to building up her own house in support of her husband’s mission. See But who does the dishes?

Have we missed something you want to know? Ask us.

Last updated Wednesday, July 20, 2020.

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